‘Mom, I think she’s really hurt.” Were the words Jennifer said as I answered the phone.

       Jennifer explained that Grace had taken Oliver, our 100 pound lab, for a walk. Oliver saw the neighbors dog, Sarge, and ran to greet him, wrapping Grace’s legs in the leash, knocking her to the ground. She fell on her left side pretty hard, busted her lip, scrapped her check and had a little rope burn around her ankle. Grace is a tough kid. Any other time she would have jumped up brushed herself off and said, “I’m fine.” Not this time. 

   I was visiting my mom in the rehab center. I kissed mom bye and raced home. Once home, I checked Grace over. Made her roll her ankle to check it, her lip looked fine, but now she mentioned it hurt to breathe.  I had her lay flat and noticed her left side looked a little swollen, right under her ribs. When I went to touch it she screamed in pain.  I told my husband, Bill, that I think I should take her to the  Emergency Room to check for a broken rib. She got up to go and immediately started throwing up. Bill looked at me wide eyed and said take her. 

     We arrived at the ER around 8pm on Wednesday, April 13th. When we entered triage they took her temperature. It was normal. The doctor came in, she touched Grace’s side and suggested a CT scan because it could be a rib, or maybe her spleen. They took her back almost right away to do the CT. When she came back to the room , her temperature was 99. She was continuing to vomit. But she also just had her Covid vaccine the day before. So we just thought it was a side effect. The next time they took her vitals, her temp had gone up to 100.6, and the next time 103.  

Around 11:20pm the doctor asked to speak with me, she took me down the hall, into another hall and into a small breakroom-like office. Hmmm this is different… That’s when it dawned on me …this must be bad. The doctor proceeded to tell me that Grace’s ribs are fine, her spleen is fine BUT…… they did find a large mass on her left kidney and it’s cancer. She mentioned Wilms Tumor, she has already been in contact with All Childrens Hospital in St. Pete. Grace threw up again, the doctor said you should go now, don’t wait. She called an ambulance and I called Bill.

   At 1:32am on Thursday morning, Grace was loaded into the ambulance and headed to All Children’s. She was excited about riding in an ambulance. She wanted me to send this picture to her teacher. 

Everything has happened so fast. I didn’t have time to think.   

 About 5:30 they were ready to put her in a room. Nurses and doctors were in and out. They were continuing to do tests and decided they would do surgery on Friday, but because she is an "add on" they didn’t know what time. They explained they will remove the tumor if they can. If it’s too big, they may close her up and shrink it. Then remove it when it’s smaller. They are planning on putting in a port at the same time, so she doesn’t have to go through more than one surgery.  

Everything has happened so fast. I haven’t had time to think.

    Grace had no appetite on Thursday. She only drank a tiny bit, and was continuing to vomit when she did drink. They gave her meds to reduce the fever and stop the vomiting. She was not in the best of moods because of her headache. 

   They have an app here called Mychart. All of her test results get emailed to me. So I was able to see the results of the CT and measurements of the Tumor  15.7cm x 11.4cm x 11.2cm… so in kindergarten teacher terms 6.18inches x 4.48 in. X 4.409 inches.

  The doctors came in and let me know to expect to be here about 2 weeks. These doctors are SO amazing. They truly make me feel like she is their only patient. I know she isn’t, but they are so caring. They take time, sit down and make sure all our questions are answered. They have a 3 hour block slotted for the surgery but it could take longer or not be as long. 

Everything has happened so fast. I haven’t had time to think.

 

A lady came in with a doll that has a port to explain what a port is and why it’s being implanted. The doll is a girl.. it is bald…..😢 They also brought Grace a lot of toys to play with. Grace doesn’t want to play. She is sleeping a lot. Grace is mad because she is going to miss Easter and the chorus concert . 

  At 12:30 in the afternoon, on Friday, they came to get her for surgery. However she was still running a fever. The doctor believes that it’s from the tumor, they gave her antibiotics the day before so he felt confident to proceed. We were able to stay with her until they wheeled her into the OR around 1:15pm.The nurses did a great job updating us. Around 6pm. Dr. Danielson came and sat down with us. He explained that Grace was still in the OR and would be there about another hour and a half. He explained the procedure. They removed the tumor and her kidney. He said it had ruptured but looked like an old rupture, so she still probably has little particles floating around. The tumor was pressing up against her pancreas so much that her pancreas had kind of rolled and was draped over it. He said it’s a very large tumor and she has a very large scar. He held his hands up almost like a football size. Bill later put it in perspective for me, he said imagine a 4x4 wooded post… now picture it’s 6 inches long. That is what they took out of her tiny body. 

    Dr. Danielson explained that because it ruptured it automatically bumps it up a stage. We do not know what stage of cancer or what kind of cancer until the biopsy comes back. However, we do know it won’t be a stage 1. 

Now… I have time to think…This beautiful girl has cancer. Not might have… She has cancer. My daughter has cancer.   I’m not sure what to feel. It doesn’t seem fair. I’ve already dealt with a child with a life threatening disease. I’m not mad. When Bill said he felt God was telling him to adopt, we prayed and prayed for the right children to be placed with us. I know this is God’s plan.  I feel like it was God’s plan all along to give us this strong willed, kind, brilliant little girl . This little girl that is about to face the fight for her life.  We’ve been here… not this child, not this disease but the fight for your child’s life. We’ve been here. I know this road. I feel like God gave her to us to give her a fighting chance. I feel like ok God.I hear you. I will do everything I possibly can to make sure my amazing Grace has a fighting chance. Don’t get me wrong. I want to cry. I want to UGLY cry. I hide the tears so this girl can be strong.  

     She has an epidural to manage the pain, and a tube down her nose to suck the saliva and fluid out of her stomach until her belly starts working right. She hates this tube. She wants a blue raspberry icee and is not happy that she can’t drink anything until the tube is out. She also has a tube hanging from the incision for drainage. 

   Every time the nurses ask, how are you feeling. She answers “Amazing”or “Never been better”. She was able to sit in a chair twice today for about 30 minutes each time. Walking to the chair hurts. She doesn’t want to sit up. She looks me in the eye… and I give her a pep talk. “We’ve got this Grace. 30 minutes sitting up in a chair to help your lungs. We can do this. It’s uncomfortable but we are fighting this. You can do this. It’s what we need to do to get you better.” This sweet stubborn girl, sits back in the chair and says ,”This is nice.”  Mind over matter… we will fight this together baby girl. 

 I am amazed by our support system. Everyone has been so helpful pitching in to help with the girls, helping with sub plans, offering to sub my class, coming to sit with Grace so I can eat (She still can not have anything by mouth ,we won’t eat in front of her.) or just coming to keep me company so I don’t lose my mind. I appreciate all the wonderful people in my life. Everyone keeps asking how they can help. Right now just prayers. Please pray for this sweet girl, who already has been through so much. 

   The hospital has strict rules about visitors. Only two people in the room at a time. And only a total of 4 visitors a day. No children except siblings. So all the girls haven’t even been able to visit. Also, we can FaceTime, if Grace is up for it. She sleeps a lot during the day, but we will try to get back with everyone who inquires about visiting.